Like many others we are struggling financially. Actually struggling doesn’t even begin to cut it.

Two years ago we were struggling but we had a nice Victorian home we rented. All the kids had there own room.  We had a nice vehicle, a Suburban without problems. We had lots of books and were walking distance to the public pool and downtown.

Today we have very little in the way of things. Very little. We live in a rundown trailer. We had to divide the back room into two separate rooms, one for the boys and one for Zoe. The rooms barely fit their beds. Most of our things got damaged in the move. Wolfgang quit playing hockey (for a team), in part, it was just too expensive.

About a week and a half ago, our electricity was shut off. That’s right, we have no power. We need way more money than we have to turn it back on. Part of what we owe is leftover from that Victorian we rented in Dover. I didn’t shut the electricity off to it when we left so what we owe includes a number of months we were not living there. It’s not something I’m upset about, at least not in the way of being resentful. I owe the money. We owe the money. And I don’t mind paying even for the time we weren’t living there because I feel we left abruptly and even wish we could do more for the landlord. They were great people we were caught just up with what was going on with us. I want to pay it.

We also have medical bills, student loans, even some tax stuff we have to sort out (although, I don’t believe we’ll end up owing anything there). We were weren’t/aren’t big on credit cards so it’s not like we have a lot of that kind of debt. It’s just life stuff. If we ever had something big to buy like a computer or whatever we’d just put the money aside and buy it outright. We didn’t do credit.

Neither Jeff or I have been working for a year and a half. Not working at a job, anyway. It’s not that we haven’t been working really. It’s that we have shifted completely the way we do things. Jeff used to go out and work and work and work at big construction jobs (which with the economy there really aren’t any now even if that’s what we wanted). He lived a life separate from us. And we lived a life separate from him. He was never home and my life with the kids had started to run parallel to his. It wasn’t good for any of us.

Today we focus on living a life that inspires us and our children. We focus on our life with the kids and our relationships with them and each other. We work toward reducing suffering through vegetarianism, we volunteer, we advocate for sexual assault victims (and have written a published a book all in the last year) and do our best to give positively to the world and the people around us. This has become our priority, our full-time job. What living this life entails is more work than anything we’ve done before, but with it comes more joy, love and connection.

We don’t take advantage of government programs like welfare, food stamps, public schools etc. because we feel it’s a violation of our core principles. We are not opposed to charity, in fact, we had a fundraiser to help publish our book and I just added a donate button to this very page.  It’s just if we are to take advantage of any generosity we want to know for sure it was freely given.

Presently our biggest efforts are finding ways to earn income to feed, house and clothe ourselves and our children in a way that is conducive to our family living.  But as with most new ventures there is a building period and in many ways it’s as though we are starting from scratch. I’m confident that our book, my photography, this blog, our Homeschool webshow and Jeff’s illustration work, our children’s book projects, my video work etc. will evolve to a point where we are not only financially stable but we have paid back all our debts and can give financially to causes that matter to us.  We just are not there *yet* — keep watching us and you’ll see we’ll make it!

How are we getting  by now?

We barter with our landlord for rent, right now we are building a greenhouse for him. A commercial sized greenhouse. We’ve sold a lot of our stuff, including most of Jeff’s larger tools. We share a cell phone. It’s a Boost Mobile phone that costs only $50/mo for unlimited use. We have another pay as you go phone around for when the kids need one but we probably put $10/mo on it…if that. We had to give our Suburban back to the bank last year. To get around we borrowed a couple of vehicles from friends and in January we bought a little Subaru for $500. It’s beat up but it runs and gets us to our groups and little jobs and it uses next to nothing in gas. We don’t pay for internet. We’ve found some WiFi spots around where we live and/or we go to Barnes and Noble or Starbucks (currently I’m sitting in Starbucks).

The loss of our electricity has been a gift in many ways. Laugh…but it has. It’s brought us even closer and shown us just how much we can actually deal with and still be happy. Really, truly happy.

Our goal as a family is to get out on the road. To travel around and meet other homeschooling/unschooling families. Last December we traded Jeff’s 1971 Harley Sporster for an RV. We took it on a couple of trips but now it needs a transmission. And we’ve been looking at school buses. We’d like to pick one up and convert it into a living space then travel around and meet, interview and video other families. Families that unschool. Families that public school. Families that homeschool. Families that private school. Families. Lots of Families.

The kids have been living with less than they are used to materially for the last year and a half. However they are living with MORE than they are used to freedom wise over the last year and a half. Because we’ve shifted to whole life unschooling. Our kids are free to make choices for themselves. They can choose when to get up, when to go to bed, when to read a book, when to build something, when to create, when to use play video games, when to play outside and so much more.

Some people might look at us and see neglectful parents, parents with kids that don’t have a lot of rules and don’t even have electricity…but those people would be so far from reality. Jeff and I have *never* been more attentive to the needs of our children than we have been this past year. We talk with them constantly about what their individual interests and goals are. We are WITH them nearly all the time. We bring them on adventures. We introduce them to more families and children who may or may not live how we do. We talk with them but more importantly we listen to them. We answer questions. We discuss. We find resources for their interests. Which include music, building, friends, technology, welding, boating, animals…and more of course…there is always more.

As a result we have children that write things like this. Kids that don’t complain about taking a bath with buckets of water (without electricity we have no running water). Kids that help lug the five gallon buckets of water from the greenhouse across the street every day. Kids that are actually excited about figuring out how to design a system of running/hot water that we’ll be able to transfer into an RV/Bus once we get one for the road. Kids that are just truly amazing.

When I hear people complaining about things like their AC going out, or their husband not taking out the trash I almost don’t know what to think. I’m living with no electricity. Actually, we do have a generator that we run for a few hours a day.  No running water (though we think we have that figured out so we should have it in the next couple of days). Our vehicle has not AC. We are mostly broke. We owe a lot of money.

Not to mention all the that is going on in the world at large…war, the oil spill…sigh…so much…

If you look at all the things we have against us it sounds like we have a miserable life. Then you look again and you see…

A husband and wife who have made it through infidelity, financial problems and much more. A couple who in the course of a year’s time have written and published a book that has moved and inspired literally hundreds of people all over the world.

A man who has decided to change his life for the better. A man who isn’t hiding from his past and is willing to put himself (and his skeletons) out for the world to see. A man who is dedicating his life to being a better husband and father. A man who is learning to be more compassionate and patient.

A woman that likes to take pictures and writes writes writes…with the aim of inspiring others in a peaceful way.

Three kids that I could write pages and pages about how great they are.

No, NONE of us are perfect. But we ARE happy. We ARE loving. We ARE compassionate. We ARE inspired. And we LOVE to learn.

Five people that love each other. Kids that love to learn and parents that are engaged and resourceful in finding ways to facilitate that learning. Whether it’s finding opportunities for the kids to earn money so they can buy things like iPods or a netbook or taking them on adventures to meet new people and have new experiences. A family that doesn’t just talk about their days but actually experience their days together. Kids that are allowed to be exactly who they are.

A family that chooses to live life by their own rules.

Creating love in these hard times is easy. You just have to choose to do it. Choose to see it. Choose to learn it. Choose to LIVE it.

Peace,

Kelly